We were howling at the moon Friday night.
That could be the opening line of the telling of one of my exceedingly vivid dreams. Any other day it might be. But this time we actually were howling. But it was with laughter.
You see, the Presley's learned they are potentially richer than they could have ever imagined. However, they are not rich because they are 8th Cousins to THE Presley. They are not rich because they are Children of the Most High. They are not rich because they are a tight-knit family who loves each other completely--warts and all. Even though all of those things are true, none of those reasons are the source of their potential riches.
As they realized the source of their wealth they shook their heads in disbelief, and howled with laughter that rendered them gasping and speachless: their soon-to-be-rich-beyond-their-wildest-dreams-empire will be based on a nuisance plant.
It all started 52 years ago when Curtis Breaux married into the unorthodox Presley clan. Before his untimely death, Curtis was thought to be a sane, level-headed, clear-thinking Cajun.
They now think the Cajun may have been slightly off his rocker.
For nigh on thirty years now, the Presley Men, all experienced hunters, have walked past the topiary in Linda and Curtis' front yard. They've gazed upon its beautiful Pompoms. The Presley Patriarch has often marveled at Curtis' ability to grow such beautiful plants.
Dale and his two sons, Michah and Ryan, thought this beautiful shrub looked familiar; however, they couldn't recall the name of the species. It was the old Tip-of-the-Tongue phenomenon. Finally, on Friday night, they asked Linda about the shrub they had admired lo these many decades. And her answer left us us all howling until 1:45 am.
Years ago her level-headed, sane, husband spent $60 on the very same plant species that is the bane of the Presley hunting land.
Every year this plant builds a wall. A wall so dense President-elect Trump should look into scattering it along our boarders. If he does this, his Wall will build itself. The plant is indestructible. And believe me when I tell you the guys graphically described their yearly efforts at trying to erradicate the plant--or at least enough to make an opening that their deer-targets can squeeze through onto their land. They have chopped it with a machete. They have bulldozed it to the ground. They have burned it and scattered the ashes to the four corners of the earth. Yet, like a pheonix, every year it resurrects itself, rising once again from its ashes to form an even thicker wall than the previous year.
All night long the men shook their heads in disbelief as they talked about Curtis spending quite a chunk of change to buy one of the hated plants and plant it for all the world to see in a place of landscape honor.
Curious, Micah Googled the present-day cost of this topiary plant and found they can bring $2,000.00 to the bank. The boys jaws dropped. Stuned and speechless, they realized they have been sitting on a cash cow all these years and never realized it. Not only that, they had worked hard at killing it. Very hard.
Linda, defending her husband, pointed out her beautiful plant had 20 or so symmetrical pom-poms, while the boys acres of plants are unshaped and in their natural scraggly form. Thinking that reshaping acres of their wall-forming plant might be more labor intense than they would be willing to endure, Michah researched other uses for their new-found gold mine.
He learned this ding-dang plant is the only North American plant that containes caffine, and when dried and brewed it produces a highly sought-after, antioxidant filled tea.
Howling in disbelief, they realize they now have three lucrative fortune building uses for their nuisence plant: Ding-Dang Drink, Terrifically Overpriced Topiary, and Bodacious Border Builder.
Who would've thunk their future fortune would come from this hated plant? Surely not the Presley Men. It took a wise Cajun to show them the way.
Now they just have to harvest their Youpon Grove.
