The Warning

My mouth sometimes gets me in trouble. I try to temper my speech with grace, but when I'm really irritated I tend to ignore the warning bells and red flags.

Tonight I went to HEB for my late night grocery run, and there was an SUV parked in the oncoming driving lane. Slow drivers in the passing lane is one of my pet peeves--especially when I'm running late. Parking in any travel lane, whether I'm traveling in it or not, is kind of high on my  irritation list as well.  They pose a huge safety hazard. But tonight, since it was just the two of us in the parking lot, I could have overlooked this flagrant disrespect of safety.

Except, he had extra lights on his rooftop. And all of his lights were a blindingly brilliant bright white. Most of the time that signifies one of three classifications of people:  Cop, Hunter, or Red Neck Good Ole Country Boy.

On occassion, they are one and the same.

His blindingly bright lights put me over the edge, and I decided I was going to chat him up and explain a few things. As I pulled along side him I rolled down my window and slowed to a stop. He rolled down his window about the same time I noticed the BPD logo on the trunk portion of his vehicle.

Warning Bells chimmed and Red Flags waved at me as he asked if there was a problem.

Cop.

"Why yes there is Officer," I said in a respectful  albeit stern tone of voice, ignoring the flags and bells, "Do you realize how bright the lights on the top of your SUV are to oncoming traffic?"

He quickly flipped them off, apologized, and explained he had just come from "out back" and had forgotten to turn them off.

Cop + Hunter (two out of  three so far, just maybe not the kind of hunter I was thinking).

I can only assume the "out back" reference meant the loading dock behind the store and not Australia.  Because if his SUV is capable of multiple modes of transportation (e.g. sailing and/or flying) in addition to the traditional driving, I need whatever he's driving.

The jury is still out on whether or not he's also a Red Neck Good Ole Country Boy, but since I usually like them (except when they act like 2 year old jerks), I'm leaning toward this Police Officer being the trifecta.

And more importantly, since I like Trifectas,  and since he quickly corrected the lighting, I let him off with a warning.