Once upon a time I knew a man who threw tantrums and bullied
his way thru life. Very few limits, if any, were placed on him. He avoided
personal responsibility at all costs. He expected, demanded, and received the
care of others for his well-being, because according to him, to take
responsibility for himself would result in a "loss of his money and
freedom.”
He was perfectly content to
allow others to meet all his needs—and most of his wants. Perfectly content to abuse the system. Perfectly content to pitch fits until other people picked up his slack. Until other people took care of his needs.
His lifestyle of entitlement, personal irresponsibility,
bullying, and tantrum throwing served him most of his life. But in the end, a
failed bully-session and a temper tantrum gone awry cost him everything he
sought to keep—his money, his freedom, and soon his very life.
Who is at fault?
Him—because he was doing what had worked for him his entire
life?
Society—because we allowed and enabled the behaviors to
continue?
As much as we hate discipline, and as much as we balk against
rules and limits—and answers other than "yes" (like "wait"
and "no"), these unpopular answers, rules, and limits are important.
There are reasons, we should work for our food and housing. There are reasons
we should pay our taxes, wear our seat belts and helmets, and keep our
insurance up to date. There are reasons we should not pass in low visibility roadways,
or speed in certain conditions. These limits keep us safer from harmful situations. These expectations help us to live productive lives and avoid the most destitute of situations.
Does following the rules and regulations, or living up to societal expectations ensure we will be prosperous, or have easy lives? No. But they enhance the probability. Are all rules, regulations, policies, and procedures right
and good? No. But we change them by going
through the proper channels. We demonstrate peacefully. We vote out poor
excuses for leaders. And when we are
forced to fight as a last resort, we do so. However, we don’t start with the fighting, or the entitlement mentality—or at least we shouldn’t.
Don't be deceived—there are
consequences for every action and choice we make (even those times we make passive
"non-choices"). We sometimes
forget about consequences because we don’t always see them. But there will be an ultimate
day of reckoning each and every one of us.
I hope my own disregard for rules does not end in tragedy
like it did for this man. I want a Happily Ever After.
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