And it so begins: The
Great Cool Weather Apparel Migration.
The migration is an annual phenomenon in which normally
docile sweaters, light-weight coats and jackets, gloves, hats, wraps and scarfs of all weights and sizes
exert their independence. Yes, even as we work long hours to supply them with
laundry detergent, fabric softener, or dry cleaning, the ungrateful apparel dare
to plot their exodus.
Oh, they might appear
to meekly accompany us to work in the chill of the morning. However, make no
mistake about it, they have observed their Sock Cousins and will bail on us at
the first hint of warm weather.
It begins innocently enough.
A scarf or wrap, carried on the arm rather than worn, is left at work or in the SUV on a frost-free
evening. It progresses to a missing hat or singleton glove a day or two
later. Before you realize what has transpired, you go to your Coat Closet and note
your favorite hoodie is MIA. You assume it’s in the dirty clothes hamper
awaiting Laundry Day. But it’s not. The
mornings and afternoons continue in the warming trend and thoughts of hoodies and gloves
are replaced with frantic calls to the spa for long neglected waxings and
pedicures.
However, the weather is like a fickle woman who changes her
mind often. After the threat of frost is
past, an unusually brisk Nor’Easter prompts a return visit to the Coat Closet.
This time the Coat Closet appears noticeably less congested—not only is the
favorite hoodie missing, so are three coats, a jacket, two hats, six scarves, a
pair woolen gloves, and a singleton of the extravagantly priced leather gloves,
bought on sale with a Birthday Gift Card, and only worn once. The singleton
is found, bloated beyond recognition, the morning after a monsoon. A Google search ensues on how to repair the
damage. The glove is blocked with absorbent
towels, and left to air dry for several days.
To complicate matters, Laundry Day has come and gone, the
hamper stands forlorn and empty, and the hoodie, and remaining missing items
have not been located.
Where could everything
be? Is a
question that perplexes sweater owners
through the ages. That, and Where did the sock-mate go? But that’s the topic for another post, another
day. Now I’m off to corral my miscellaneous
cool weather apparel—most of which have escaped and migrated to my SUV or office.
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